PARENTING

Too Tired To Fight: 13 Essential Conflicts Parents Must Have To Keep Their Relationship Strong

Putnam. Jul. 2024. 304p. ISBN 9780593714270. $30. CHILD REARING
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This book explores the most common reasons that arguments arise between couples who have children. As counselors (and a married couple) specializing in couples therapy for parents, they base their case studies on topics compiled from the countless sessions they’ve had with couples. They also write from their shared experiences raising three children together. Their book’s main message is that working through difficult situations can lead to stronger connections between partners, instead of the division and isolation many couples experience during the parenting years. They address why couple-related arguments seem to occur more frequently or feel worse when kids are in the picture, and they explain the role that deep-rooted triggers play in conflicts and how to prevent quarrels from escalating. They assert there are benefits too when both people remain present during the exchange, instead of being dismissive or inattentive. The book contains questions for parents to consider and discuss with their partner. There are also scenarios that demonstrate how the authors utilize a four-step approach—assess, attune, reflect, and share—to help the couples they counsel.
VERDICT A meaty counseling session, presented in book form, that expertly dispels common misconceptions about conflicts between couples with children.
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